I create the mood.
Lovely, soft lights...
maybe some candles.
A nice, home-cooked meal for myself.
I wrap myself in a blanket
creating a cozy environment.
I try to focus on the light;
pacify myself with beautiful love songs.
Closing my eyes to transport myself
to such stuff as dreams are made on.
Humming the notes that mask the deafening silence.
I breathe in and out, slowly, deeply.
Listening to my own heartbeat.
But my smiles can't ease the pain,
'cause in the end I'm alone again.
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